This is something I do way too well. I have not figured out why, or better yet how to stop it, but knowledge is the first step.
Today was a good example of how i do this.
I love my job, and I work hard at it. I know it is term limited, and I know that there is a set of very complex issues within the group I work for. There is a small contingent within the group that really has focused on accentuating the neediness of people and has used the issue to promote continuation for longer than will be realistic. The town that offered the space I work out of was the town that took the biggest hit in the tornado. They are also ready for “normal” to come back into focus, and are promoting that heavily.
I just learned today that my friend, the town clerk has been directed to withhold any help for the group I work for, to the extent that they would rather not be providing me a workspace. It was made very clear that this is not about me, the individual, but that they just want to be out of the “tornado business”. One board member specifically (its only a 4 member board) is just adamant about the whole thing, even to the extent of taking on his peer who sits on the organizing group i work for.
as i said, it was made very clear that its not anything personal. But....how can i not take it personally? So begins my internal debate. Do I offer to find somewhere else to work? I move to part time in less than 2 weeks, do I move it home? Am I compromising my friend with her board by taking, brainstorming, picking her brain when i need the support? What did i do to tick this guy off? S•H•I•T!!!
and so my thought process goes...on and on and on. What I do matters. I have been able to help many. I check out regularly whether or not I am still necessary, and it can be a difficult thought process, because financially even going to part time will be difficult for me, but I also will not waste the resources if i am no longer necessary.
i can't not feel hurt. I shouldn't personalize this....but the catch in my voice, the slightly watery eyes give me away, if only to myself. I should have the skills to handle this professionally and not personally. But i don't seem to be able to do that.
Tuesday, November 29, 2005
Wednesday, November 23, 2005
The Alberta Clipper
It has been a while since I have heard those words......
To a midwesterner those words have a clear and specific meaning, and it has nothing to do with ocean going craft. It means the winter weather sweeps down from Canada, bringing cold and....SNOW! and so it did.
The season has shared with us its first dose of the white stuff. I love it. and just in time for the holiday!
I doubt that it will last that long....it was beginning to melt even as I drove to work.
But the blanket of white and the silence that enrobes all that can be seen was a nice thing to wake to this morning.
To a midwesterner those words have a clear and specific meaning, and it has nothing to do with ocean going craft. It means the winter weather sweeps down from Canada, bringing cold and....SNOW! and so it did.
The season has shared with us its first dose of the white stuff. I love it. and just in time for the holiday!
I doubt that it will last that long....it was beginning to melt even as I drove to work.
But the blanket of white and the silence that enrobes all that can be seen was a nice thing to wake to this morning.
Sunday, November 20, 2005
lazy day
haven't had one of these in ages or so it feels.
this one will probably be spent not doing much of anything. maybe some simple cooking. i find the older i get the need to recoup some of what i have put out gets greater and greater. after yesterday, the past week, no more like the past 3 weeks, my need to recoup is major. so i got up, reheated the left over coffee, made english muffins with peanut butter, and came to sit in front of the computer.
i have checked out my email, read some blogs, done some blogging, played a few online games (hollywood stock exchange and BlogShares being the focus of my energy...even though i have NO knowledge of stock markets), then some more blogging.
the next move will be to go into the living room with a blanket and curt up and watch unique television.....without the computer at my side.
That's the Way I've Always Heard It Should Be from the album “Carly Simon: Clouds in My Coffee 1965-1995” by Carly Simon
this one will probably be spent not doing much of anything. maybe some simple cooking. i find the older i get the need to recoup some of what i have put out gets greater and greater. after yesterday, the past week, no more like the past 3 weeks, my need to recoup is major. so i got up, reheated the left over coffee, made english muffins with peanut butter, and came to sit in front of the computer.
i have checked out my email, read some blogs, done some blogging, played a few online games (hollywood stock exchange and BlogShares being the focus of my energy...even though i have NO knowledge of stock markets), then some more blogging.
the next move will be to go into the living room with a blanket and curt up and watch unique television.....without the computer at my side.
That's the Way I've Always Heard It Should Be from the album “Carly Simon: Clouds in My Coffee 1965-1995” by Carly Simon
things to do...when i have some free time
in no particular order:
read, and re-read
the first:
one i want to re-read for our book club. I was amazed at the reviews given in amazons reader reviews. I guess i was one of the few that really liked this book.
knit the eyelash yarn scarf i started last spring
its a pretty thing in purples, but i never got past about 8 inches.
start my holiday cards
the craft room downstairs has been abandoned for some time. sad but exhaustion allows me to vegetate in front of a computer screen.
finish all the minutes for all the organizations i have to do them for
these have to be done sooner than later. maybe later today?
pick up the supplies for the grandkids crafting
this assumes we will even be able to have them for the time it takes to do them. the idea of the home made christmas is a good one but it takes commitment to the projects. and that would require my daughter to make a commitment to something outside of herself. [sigh]
clean out the office
major project. has not really been done since we had the business. the office became the only safe dumping ground when the bug and her mom took over the house, and has just deteriorated from there. must do project, but will be put off.
sort out the summer clothes and bring out the winter clothes
this will have to happen soon as well, things are spilling out all over, and the clutter we hate is taking over again
Axel F from the album “Beverly Hills Cop III” by Nile Rodgers Featuring Richard Hilton
read, and re-read
the first:
one i want to re-read for our book club. I was amazed at the reviews given in amazons reader reviews. I guess i was one of the few that really liked this book.
knit the eyelash yarn scarf i started last spring
its a pretty thing in purples, but i never got past about 8 inches.
start my holiday cards
the craft room downstairs has been abandoned for some time. sad but exhaustion allows me to vegetate in front of a computer screen.
finish all the minutes for all the organizations i have to do them for
these have to be done sooner than later. maybe later today?
pick up the supplies for the grandkids crafting
this assumes we will even be able to have them for the time it takes to do them. the idea of the home made christmas is a good one but it takes commitment to the projects. and that would require my daughter to make a commitment to something outside of herself. [sigh]
clean out the office
major project. has not really been done since we had the business. the office became the only safe dumping ground when the bug and her mom took over the house, and has just deteriorated from there. must do project, but will be put off.
sort out the summer clothes and bring out the winter clothes
this will have to happen soon as well, things are spilling out all over, and the clutter we hate is taking over again
Axel F from the album “Beverly Hills Cop III” by Nile Rodgers Featuring Richard Hilton
One down.....
Well its all said and done.
Woke to the dark, watched the sun crest the edge of the world. There was no snow on the ground, there were no rain clouds in sight. Made my coffee, got organized and headed out. My check-in volunteers were there 5 minutes early, a very good sign.
The wind was wicked, but the staging site, a church called LakeView, was up on a hill, and yes the wind chill was a force to be reckoned with. BUT, volunteers came as they were requested to, staggered over an hour and a half, rolled in, got their equipment, their water, their blaze orange vests, and a map of where to go. The residents they helped were thrilled, and by the end of the day all reported either completion of their projects or significant headway.
I came home, cold to the bone, relieved and feeling exhaustedly successful.
Only one more event, and 3 weeks time before the job becomes part time.
A good thing....and not so good.
but it is the way it should be.
Woke to the dark, watched the sun crest the edge of the world. There was no snow on the ground, there were no rain clouds in sight. Made my coffee, got organized and headed out. My check-in volunteers were there 5 minutes early, a very good sign.
The wind was wicked, but the staging site, a church called LakeView, was up on a hill, and yes the wind chill was a force to be reckoned with. BUT, volunteers came as they were requested to, staggered over an hour and a half, rolled in, got their equipment, their water, their blaze orange vests, and a map of where to go. The residents they helped were thrilled, and by the end of the day all reported either completion of their projects or significant headway.
I came home, cold to the bone, relieved and feeling exhaustedly successful.
Only one more event, and 3 weeks time before the job becomes part time.
A good thing....and not so good.
but it is the way it should be.
Friday, November 18, 2005
Chill is in the air
I think mother nature is in a hormonal haze.
Last weekend there were tornados all across the midsection of the continent.
Midweek we had snow.
The last couple of days the temps have been subzero with the wind chill factors
The weekend they promise warmer weather. I hope I can count on that, as i have hundreds of volunteers coming out for the last post tornado cleanup of the year.
I very much love the winter....i look forward to a good snow storm.
I fear that the aging process has taken some of the things i take for granted tho.
I feel the cold much more these days, and the fearlessness of driving in the
storms has lessened. I think too, the unique awareness of the tornado has changed something inside of me.
i love the intensity of the weather. I love watching storms, listening to the sounds, feeling the energy. But, now there is an edge of ......concern, awareness of the negative side.
im not sure i like that.
Never the less, the cold is upon us...winter draws near.
Greetings Of The Season from the album “Snow Angel” by Cris Williamson
St. Jean Port Joli from the album “Lucie Blue Tremblay” by Lucie Blue Tremblay
Last weekend there were tornados all across the midsection of the continent.
Midweek we had snow.
The last couple of days the temps have been subzero with the wind chill factors
The weekend they promise warmer weather. I hope I can count on that, as i have hundreds of volunteers coming out for the last post tornado cleanup of the year.
I very much love the winter....i look forward to a good snow storm.
I fear that the aging process has taken some of the things i take for granted tho.
I feel the cold much more these days, and the fearlessness of driving in the
storms has lessened. I think too, the unique awareness of the tornado has changed something inside of me.
i love the intensity of the weather. I love watching storms, listening to the sounds, feeling the energy. But, now there is an edge of ......concern, awareness of the negative side.
im not sure i like that.
Never the less, the cold is upon us...winter draws near.
Greetings Of The Season from the album “Snow Angel” by Cris Williamson
St. Jean Port Joli from the album “Lucie Blue Tremblay” by Lucie Blue Tremblay
Wednesday, November 16, 2005
Oatmeal and the Snow that Wasn't
I know....strange combination for a title! but it really does make some sense...at least to me.
The monster weather here in the midwest has just been overwhelming. First snow of the season was forecast last night. 1-4 inches was the threat. Once again, it skillfully avoided us.. We had naught but a dusting of the white stuff. I love snow (although this one was not high on my list because I have a big cleanup event planned for tornado survivors on Satuday), but it seems as tho for the last 5 years most of the snowstorms of any consequence have narrowly avoided me. last night i watched the radar and saw the line of demarcation between snow and rain snake and dance just along side of my community. storms seem to have a habit of late of swinging south, staying north or as in the case of last nights storms just avoid us.
So i woke this morning hoping to see more than a dusting, actually planning to eat breakfast (toasted english muffin at least) and was so disappointed with the weather, I decided maybe an old fashioned bowl of oatmeal might make it feel more winter-like. It didn't but the oatmeal was good. One of those tastes from childhood that is still as i remember it.
Now i get to go out and strap the ice skates on the car and hope the other idiots on the road remember how to drive on winter weather affected roads!
Medley: Turning It Over/Joanna/Sweet Darlin' Woman/If I Live (I'll Be Great)/Ode To A Gym Teacher... from the album “Meg/Cris At Carnegie Hall” by Meg Christian/Cris Williamson
The monster weather here in the midwest has just been overwhelming. First snow of the season was forecast last night. 1-4 inches was the threat. Once again, it skillfully avoided us.. We had naught but a dusting of the white stuff. I love snow (although this one was not high on my list because I have a big cleanup event planned for tornado survivors on Satuday), but it seems as tho for the last 5 years most of the snowstorms of any consequence have narrowly avoided me. last night i watched the radar and saw the line of demarcation between snow and rain snake and dance just along side of my community. storms seem to have a habit of late of swinging south, staying north or as in the case of last nights storms just avoid us.
So i woke this morning hoping to see more than a dusting, actually planning to eat breakfast (toasted english muffin at least) and was so disappointed with the weather, I decided maybe an old fashioned bowl of oatmeal might make it feel more winter-like. It didn't but the oatmeal was good. One of those tastes from childhood that is still as i remember it.
Now i get to go out and strap the ice skates on the car and hope the other idiots on the road remember how to drive on winter weather affected roads!
Medley: Turning It Over/Joanna/Sweet Darlin' Woman/If I Live (I'll Be Great)/Ode To A Gym Teacher... from the album “Meg/Cris At Carnegie Hall” by Meg Christian/Cris Williamson
Tuesday, November 15, 2005
There is a difference between LEGAL and RIGHT!
and it falls under the heading of stop covering ones ass....and do the right thing.
I am frustrated with a volunteer organization whose former director criminally misdirected his board of directors so he could cover his own mismanagement, and now a second volunteer organization will end up paying the price. AND there is only so much that i can do to stop the train wreck from happening. what is even worse is that the group that will pay the price is a youth group, who trusted the bigger organization.
the “come to Jesus' meeting will be in two weeks, and I am just not sure where it will go from there. my position is a unique one. I volunteer for both groups. i know the impact it will have on both. but i also know what is RIGHT. and as far as I know, there is nothing legal to fall back on either way. so lets hope that for once RIGHT will take precedence.
Lullaby for Myself from the album ”Superman“ by Barbra Streisand
I am frustrated with a volunteer organization whose former director criminally misdirected his board of directors so he could cover his own mismanagement, and now a second volunteer organization will end up paying the price. AND there is only so much that i can do to stop the train wreck from happening. what is even worse is that the group that will pay the price is a youth group, who trusted the bigger organization.
the “come to Jesus' meeting will be in two weeks, and I am just not sure where it will go from there. my position is a unique one. I volunteer for both groups. i know the impact it will have on both. but i also know what is RIGHT. and as far as I know, there is nothing legal to fall back on either way. so lets hope that for once RIGHT will take precedence.
Lullaby for Myself from the album ”Superman“ by Barbra Streisand
Monday, November 14, 2005
my iPod
I now have almost 1000 songs on my iPod. I would list them here but....the word doc takes 23 pages. its unique and eclectic. much like me. 2.8 solid days of music....from the Carpenters to 42nd Street, Kenny Loggins to the Royal Philharmonic, the Corrs to k.d.lang and so much more.
and i still have room for more music :)
My Boy from the album “His Greatest Performances” by Richard Harris
and i still have room for more music :)
My Boy from the album “His Greatest Performances” by Richard Harris
Spectrum Bloggers | Adding Color to the Blogosphere
what is this all about? not quite sure, but its not much lesbian. i like the colors....and the concept tho.
check it out...see what you think!
Spectrum Bloggers | Adding Color to the Blogosphere:
You And Me Against The World by Helen Reddy
check it out...see what you think!
Spectrum Bloggers | Adding Color to the Blogosphere:
You And Me Against The World by Helen Reddy
Christmas Music and other disjointed thoughts
Usually, sometime towards the end of October, I get overwhelming desire to listen to my Christmas music. Not to bring the holidays on any sooner (i abhor the fact that christmas sales begin before halloween is even over) but there is something that draws me to the songs of the holidays as I listened to and sang them as a child (and most every year since).
I adore the sounds of the season...and with few exceptions, that is about all thats left to enjoy consistently, completely under my own control. I am not an early shopper (to the contrary, I am a last minute shopper). Years ago, I abdicated baking cookies to N, as she loves to bake and without the kids doing it with me, it does not hold the same interest (the diagnosis of diabetes did add to that sense of loss too.) The other part of the holidays I adore is the meal preparation....the planning, the organizing, the cooking, setting the table (and some day I WILL have a dining room) and having a family meal. These days I can do all the lead-up, but its a bit insane trying to get family organized and happy. Ah well.
It has been an odd year tho...weather has been too warm to have triggered the need to listen and sing, and the prospect of the chaos that will follow is just more than my mind wants to cope with at the moment. So in a unique move, I will focus on a “one foot in front of the other” mode and go from there.
But...there is a chill in the air now....
You Will Be My Ain True Love from the album “Cold Mountain” by Sacred Harp Singers - Liberty
Oh Come All Ye Faithful by Martina McBride
I adore the sounds of the season...and with few exceptions, that is about all thats left to enjoy consistently, completely under my own control. I am not an early shopper (to the contrary, I am a last minute shopper). Years ago, I abdicated baking cookies to N, as she loves to bake and without the kids doing it with me, it does not hold the same interest (the diagnosis of diabetes did add to that sense of loss too.) The other part of the holidays I adore is the meal preparation....the planning, the organizing, the cooking, setting the table (and some day I WILL have a dining room) and having a family meal. These days I can do all the lead-up, but its a bit insane trying to get family organized and happy. Ah well.
It has been an odd year tho...weather has been too warm to have triggered the need to listen and sing, and the prospect of the chaos that will follow is just more than my mind wants to cope with at the moment. So in a unique move, I will focus on a “one foot in front of the other” mode and go from there.
But...there is a chill in the air now....
You Will Be My Ain True Love from the album “Cold Mountain” by Sacred Harp Singers - Liberty
Oh Come All Ye Faithful by Martina McBride
Tuesday, November 08, 2005
whether the weather....
twas a fall weekend.....cool and crisp, and then it began to rain.....a slightly unusual thunderstorm that lasted the day and night, brought down most of the multi-hued leaves that were twisting around in the wind. blanketing the earth around us in a patchwork quilt of the ultimate earth-tones in leave shape patches.
the same weather pattern left devastation in its path. a freak tornado in the beginning of November, at 2:30 in the morning. the tragedy brings back memories of what i work with day in and day out...but again not, because we were really so lucky with only one death to their 23 and counting.
mother nature in all her glory and power. we think that we can outwit her....she does not argue, she just is
Right Here Waiting from the album “ The All Time Greatest Love Songs of the 60s, 70s, 80s & 90s” by Richard Marx
the same weather pattern left devastation in its path. a freak tornado in the beginning of November, at 2:30 in the morning. the tragedy brings back memories of what i work with day in and day out...but again not, because we were really so lucky with only one death to their 23 and counting.
mother nature in all her glory and power. we think that we can outwit her....she does not argue, she just is
Right Here Waiting from the album “ The All Time Greatest Love Songs of the 60s, 70s, 80s & 90s” by Richard Marx
Friday, November 04, 2005
Firmware
In a brain that dissects words as matter of course, the word Firmware brings up some unique connotations. If i weren't at all techie, my first thot would be that we were in a discussion surrounding body sculpting or something even more distasteful like weight loss. But for those of us who talk a little tech, there is a passing knowledge of this term. It has something to do with software upgrades to hardware. But for me right now it just means PANIC-DO NOT TOUCH!!!
Last night a friend was over, his G4 laptop accessing my wi-fi. Since he is one of a couple of people who finds themselves often being my computer gurus it wasn't out of the realm of normal to suggest there was a certain slowness to my DSL and could he have my network access to fix it. Tired (early meeting/late meeting at the end of the week, and i was at the end of my energy), i gave it, and settled back to watch some tv and doze. A bit later he said “just needs a firmware upgrade, i will take care of it”, so i got a bit more comfortable on the sofa and waited. 10:30pm, he walked out of the office and said “I have bad news.” He went on to explain that the firmware upgrade actually broke the hardware and it would have to be sent in to be fixed. I refocused my eyes and shook off the sleep and simply said “that just won't work.” there are too many work related reasons that being out of internet access for a week is just not an option. an hour or so later all the details were set up for the ethernet to work to give us some internet, and sleep finally came at about 2:30.
About two months ago, I was dealing with an internet router that died after a firmware upgrade was tried to get the wifi to correct itself.
I am beginning to think that firmware is not something i ever want to mess with. not in human terms and certainly not in computer terms.
Not While I'm Around from the album “The Essential (Disc 2)” by Barbra Streisand
Last night a friend was over, his G4 laptop accessing my wi-fi. Since he is one of a couple of people who finds themselves often being my computer gurus it wasn't out of the realm of normal to suggest there was a certain slowness to my DSL and could he have my network access to fix it. Tired (early meeting/late meeting at the end of the week, and i was at the end of my energy), i gave it, and settled back to watch some tv and doze. A bit later he said “just needs a firmware upgrade, i will take care of it”, so i got a bit more comfortable on the sofa and waited. 10:30pm, he walked out of the office and said “I have bad news.” He went on to explain that the firmware upgrade actually broke the hardware and it would have to be sent in to be fixed. I refocused my eyes and shook off the sleep and simply said “that just won't work.” there are too many work related reasons that being out of internet access for a week is just not an option. an hour or so later all the details were set up for the ethernet to work to give us some internet, and sleep finally came at about 2:30.
About two months ago, I was dealing with an internet router that died after a firmware upgrade was tried to get the wifi to correct itself.
I am beginning to think that firmware is not something i ever want to mess with. not in human terms and certainly not in computer terms.
Not While I'm Around from the album “The Essential (Disc 2)” by Barbra Streisand
Wednesday, November 02, 2005
Many Layers
Layers of Me
"A meme to peel away the layers of you."
LAYER ONE:
"A meme to peel away the layers of you."
LAYER ONE:
- -- Name: Cris
- -- Birth date: March 15, 1955
- -- Birthplace: Northern Illinois
- -- Current Location: South Central Wisconsin
- -- Eye Color: Blue
- -- Hair Color: Dark Blonde, lots of grey
- -- Height: 5'10"
- -- Righty or Lefty: Righty (ambidextrous, born lefty)
- -- Zodiac Sign: Pisces
- -- Your heritage: Irish, French, German, Danish, Scandinavian
- -- The shoes you wore today: Socks!!
- -- Your weakness: Chocolate, music and babies
- -- Your fears: old, alone, eating cat food
- -- Your perfect pizza: usual sauce and cheese, pepperoni, good italian sausage, onions.
- -- Goal you'd like to achieve: a job that's right....and stays that way
- -- Your most overused phrase on chat: brb
- -- Your first waking thoughts: Ouch
- -- Your best physical feature: hands when i was younger
- -- Your most missed memory: watching the rainbow of lights on the ceiling at Christmastime
- -- Pepsi or Coke: Diet Dr Pepper (diet coke if i must)
- -- McDonald's or Burger King: KFC when the mood hits
- -- Single or group dates: Single
- -- Adidas or Nike: Reebocks
- -- Lipton Ice Tea or Nestea: Not an iced tea drinker
- -- Chocolate or vanilla: Chocolate and vanilla
- -- Cappuccino or coffee: Yes
- -- Smoke: Quit
- -- Cuss: ohhhhhhhh fuck!
- -- Sing: when ever i can
- -- Take a shower everyday: or every other in the winter (dry skin)
- -- Do you think you've been in love: mmmmmhmmmm
- -- Want to go to college: woulda, coulda, shoulda
- -- Liked high school: necessary evil
- -- Want to get married: not legal for me
- -- Believe in yourself: sometimes
- -- Get motion sickness: no
- -- Think you're attractive: rare moments
- -- Think you're a health freak: never in a million years
- -- Get along with your parent(s): at a distance
- -- Like thunderstorms: adore them
- -- Play an instrument: only my voice
- -- Drank alcohol: sips
- -- Done a drug: ibuprophen
- -- Went Out: yep
- -- Gone on a date: nope
- -- Gone to the mall?: daily
- -- Eaten an entire box of Oreos?: no, can't do that anymore
- -- Eaten sushi: not that fond of what i have tasted
- -- Been on stage: backstage
- -- Been dumped: no
- -- Gone skating: used to love ice skating..as a kid
- -- Made homemade cookies: its Christmastime...what do you think.
- -- Gone skinny dipping: never
- -- Dyed your hair: my favorite, dark auburn
- -- Stolen Anything: hearts, kisses
- -- Played a game that required removal of clothing: Yes
- -- Been trashed or extremely intoxicated: Yes
- -- Been caught "doing something": Yes
- -- Been called a tease: Yes
- -- Gotten beaten up: No
- -- Shoplifted: as a kid
- -- Changed who you were to fit in: No
- -- Age you hope to be married: been there, done that
- -- Numbers and Names of Children: Tony, Jenna and Steve
- -- Describe your Dream Wedding: Had it
- -- How do you want to die: in my sleep
- -- Where you want to go to college: anywhere
- -- What do you want to be when you grow up: Teacher
- -- What country would you most like to visit: Ireland, England, Scotland
- -- Number of drugs taken illegally: One, hated it
- -- Number of people I could trust with my life: Two
- -- Number of CDs that I own: more than I could count
- -- Number of piercings: seven
- -- Number of tattoos: none
- -- Number of times my name has appeared in the newspaper?: first time, in high school, since then more times than i could count, latest times due to the high profile job.
- -- Number of scars on my body: too many to count
- -- Number of things in my past that I regret: yes.
Tuesday, November 01, 2005
mornings vs sleep
once upon a time, some time ago, I was a night owl.
these days I am much NOT. Now that I am away from the oppressive corporate gig, i have regained some connection with the night, but have still stayed well connected to the mornings. I set an alarm, but almost always wake before it goes off.
Usually I sit in the office at the computer, sometimes with the TV morning/news programs on, other times just in silence....reading and sometimes typing. Diet Dr Pepper in hand, i wander the maze of blogs and websites and newsfeeds that i have identified as best, and often take a couple of hours to wander about on line. Then quickly shower and dress, and head out to work.
this morning there was a variance. Since we had a business meeting in the kitchen last night, my laptop stayed out on the kitchen table. I woke and made some coffee and have not varied much from the norm beyond that. The biggest difference this change of venue brings is the view of the out doors. I have a small window in the office, at my elbow, covered in screen, that looks out on the back deck. I get the sun, and the sounds of the outside but thats about it.
this glorious fall morning, looking out over the whole back yard (ours is huge), I am watching the sun rise, and the light fog diffuse the light, the dew is heavy on the grass. the trees are dropping brightly colored leaves, one, two, three at a time, birds searching for that tender tidbit in the ground. A flock of geese overhead are making their annual migration....honking their communications as they fill the sky for a moment, and a bunny hops across the patio. If it were just a bit warmer, I might have the patio door open for the crisp smells and the crunchy sounds, but 36F in a nightshirt and fleece jacket is still a bit more chill than the heat of the coffee can ward off.
but it has been a wonderful way to begin this fall day.
these days I am much NOT. Now that I am away from the oppressive corporate gig, i have regained some connection with the night, but have still stayed well connected to the mornings. I set an alarm, but almost always wake before it goes off.
Usually I sit in the office at the computer, sometimes with the TV morning/news programs on, other times just in silence....reading and sometimes typing. Diet Dr Pepper in hand, i wander the maze of blogs and websites and newsfeeds that i have identified as best, and often take a couple of hours to wander about on line. Then quickly shower and dress, and head out to work.
this morning there was a variance. Since we had a business meeting in the kitchen last night, my laptop stayed out on the kitchen table. I woke and made some coffee and have not varied much from the norm beyond that. The biggest difference this change of venue brings is the view of the out doors. I have a small window in the office, at my elbow, covered in screen, that looks out on the back deck. I get the sun, and the sounds of the outside but thats about it.
this glorious fall morning, looking out over the whole back yard (ours is huge), I am watching the sun rise, and the light fog diffuse the light, the dew is heavy on the grass. the trees are dropping brightly colored leaves, one, two, three at a time, birds searching for that tender tidbit in the ground. A flock of geese overhead are making their annual migration....honking their communications as they fill the sky for a moment, and a bunny hops across the patio. If it were just a bit warmer, I might have the patio door open for the crisp smells and the crunchy sounds, but 36F in a nightshirt and fleece jacket is still a bit more chill than the heat of the coffee can ward off.
but it has been a wonderful way to begin this fall day.
oh so silent i have been....
it seems i go thru stages where i have lots to say and then stages where i would much rather read.
Does this mean that folks are less likely to comment or even come back? not sure, but its who I am, so....
if for what ever reason, this blog has caught your attention enough to come back again, do not doubt that i will be back, the absenses are short in duration.
that said,
on to the next thought.
Does this mean that folks are less likely to comment or even come back? not sure, but its who I am, so....
if for what ever reason, this blog has caught your attention enough to come back again, do not doubt that i will be back, the absenses are short in duration.
that said,
on to the next thought.
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