I enjoy a good cup of coffee.
I'm not a connoisseur, I don't know enough about it to go that far, but I know what tastes good to me. I don't get into fancy blends or roasts, am pretty much a basic coffee person, with a bit of cream and sugar and for a special treat maybe some hazelnut or cinnamon or for a really special treat some mint and chocolate.
We have a local coffee company who makes a holiday time coffee that is called Candy Cane that has that chocolate minty flavor. Awesome!
I know that there is a bit of politics around coffee, but I have a hard time mixing my politics and my coffee....there are so many other issues out there that I focus on politically that knowing enough about the rest is overwhelming. So I have to admit that when I want a special coffee treat I head to Starbucks. I stick to my basics, and have a Grande Latte and just enjoy.
Saturday, April 30, 2005
Give the task to a busy woman
What a week it has been.
Meetings Tuesday and Wednesday night, a visit with a not so happy buglet on Thursday night, and a cooking marathon last night. It will only continue, cooking again today, dinner at a friends tonight and a fancy spread on my table on Sunday! Back towork everyday stress on Monday.
It seems that for weeks on end I can be pretty much committment free, and then all of a sudden every day/evening is full with something planned and no time to breathe.
Trying in the midst of all of this to make plans with friends we haven't seen in way too long feels torturous.
When I was younger (in my 20's& 30's) my motto was if you have something to do, give it to a busy womon, she would always find time to get it done. And I did, even with 3 small kids. In my 40's I was more focused on raising teenagers, and the schedules that come with them more than filled my life. The addition of my first grandchildren, a couple of major life upsets and a rather committed activist schedule, and there was little time to think about much else.
These days are slower, no grandchildren/children living in my house any longer, new and revived activist committments, back to working for a paycheck, not because I enjoy what I am doing. But suddenly, every night seems filled, and it feels like the merry-go-round is moving a bit too fast some days.
Now I am off to get new tires on the car. Gotta find time for the mundane too.
Meetings Tuesday and Wednesday night, a visit with a not so happy buglet on Thursday night, and a cooking marathon last night. It will only continue, cooking again today, dinner at a friends tonight and a fancy spread on my table on Sunday! Back to
It seems that for weeks on end I can be pretty much committment free, and then all of a sudden every day/evening is full with something planned and no time to breathe.
Trying in the midst of all of this to make plans with friends we haven't seen in way too long feels torturous.
When I was younger (in my 20's& 30's) my motto was if you have something to do, give it to a busy womon, she would always find time to get it done. And I did, even with 3 small kids. In my 40's I was more focused on raising teenagers, and the schedules that come with them more than filled my life. The addition of my first grandchildren, a couple of major life upsets and a rather committed activist schedule, and there was little time to think about much else.
These days are slower, no grandchildren/children living in my house any longer, new and revived activist committments, back to working for a paycheck, not because I enjoy what I am doing. But suddenly, every night seems filled, and it feels like the merry-go-round is moving a bit too fast some days.
Now I am off to get new tires on the car. Gotta find time for the mundane too.
Monday, April 25, 2005
Bed, Bath and Beyond
Its a dangerous store for me to even contemplate going into.
My name is Cris and I am addicted to kitchen gadgets.
The blonde haired kid (my daughter) once, as a teen, suggested that if I got any more kitchen gadgets, I would need to add on to the kitchen. I would love to add on to my kitchen, its way too small and I have no dining room, but besides being a logistical nightmare, it would also be a financial impossibility. But, I digress.
I love kitchen gadgets. I love to cook, I love to play with recipies, I love to eat, I love to feed people, I love to entertain. I am not much for grand fancy gourmet, I like real food, and I am best at making real food. Have I mentioned that I love kitchen gadgets?
My kitchen is about to explode at the seams. I don't have room for more, but still gadgets, appliances, tools, etc., call out to me from the store shelves. Having always been on the barely surviving side of life, most of what I have is either hand-me-downs or the cheaper or smaller versions. They say one of the keys to a dykes heart is power tools, and I am no different really, I just prefer kitchen power tools.
The latest aquisition is a Cuisinart (the only food processor). I got the medium sized one, tho I yearned for the biggest (I do not often cook for the small army anymore, supersize is wasted....so I have to keep telling myself.) With the big meal coming, I will find many uses for this newest power tool :) I can throw away the hand-me-downs, the broken ones that were given to me so if I could get them fixed I would have one of my own. I will have to make peace with the "Oscar", the mini processor that has done the job for oh so many years, and probably offer it to the blond kid as her starter processor.
I wonder whats next on the wish list? I think a microplane grater, or......
My name is Cris and I am addicted to kitchen gadgets.
The blonde haired kid (my daughter) once, as a teen, suggested that if I got any more kitchen gadgets, I would need to add on to the kitchen. I would love to add on to my kitchen, its way too small and I have no dining room, but besides being a logistical nightmare, it would also be a financial impossibility. But, I digress.
I love kitchen gadgets. I love to cook, I love to play with recipies, I love to eat, I love to feed people, I love to entertain. I am not much for grand fancy gourmet, I like real food, and I am best at making real food. Have I mentioned that I love kitchen gadgets?
My kitchen is about to explode at the seams. I don't have room for more, but still gadgets, appliances, tools, etc., call out to me from the store shelves. Having always been on the barely surviving side of life, most of what I have is either hand-me-downs or the cheaper or smaller versions. They say one of the keys to a dykes heart is power tools, and I am no different really, I just prefer kitchen power tools.
The latest aquisition is a Cuisinart (the only food processor). I got the medium sized one, tho I yearned for the biggest (I do not often cook for the small army anymore, supersize is wasted....so I have to keep telling myself.) With the big meal coming, I will find many uses for this newest power tool :) I can throw away the hand-me-downs, the broken ones that were given to me so if I could get them fixed I would have one of my own. I will have to make peace with the "Oscar", the mini processor that has done the job for oh so many years, and probably offer it to the blond kid as her starter processor.
I wonder whats next on the wish list? I think a microplane grater, or......
Passover
Please let me preface this with the admission that I am not Jewish. I have lived in a Jewish family for 15 years. I can cook many of the traditional foods, I know a smattering of Jewish symbolism, and can recite a few prayers in Hebrew. My personal religious/spiritual focus does not lend it self to organized religion, but I have always enjoyed the trappings of traditions.
This is the first year in those 15 that we will not celebrate Passover in the classic, traditional sense. Matriarchal changeover can be a difficult power exchange between mother and daughters, but it first begins with the handing off of celebrations. This year seems to be a pivital one in that respect.
I, the non-believer, miss it. This is the first seder that we have not celebrated with the traditional meal. So, I think, dispite all the obvious reasons not to, I am going to prepare said meal.
Chicken soup with matzoh balls (sinkers), gefilte fish, charosets, some kind of veggie, maybe 'sparagus. mmmmmmmmm, and matzoh...and either turkey or brisket.....
My mouth is watering already, and I haven't looked forward to cooking a major meal in a long time.
This is the first year in those 15 that we will not celebrate Passover in the classic, traditional sense. Matriarchal changeover can be a difficult power exchange between mother and daughters, but it first begins with the handing off of celebrations. This year seems to be a pivital one in that respect.
I, the non-believer, miss it. This is the first seder that we have not celebrated with the traditional meal. So, I think, dispite all the obvious reasons not to, I am going to prepare said meal.
Chicken soup with matzoh balls (sinkers), gefilte fish, charosets, some kind of veggie, maybe 'sparagus. mmmmmmmmm, and matzoh...and either turkey or brisket.....
My mouth is watering already, and I haven't looked forward to cooking a major meal in a long time.
Sunday, April 24, 2005
Renovations
The house is in chaos.
We are putting new flooring into the kitchen and hallways. It's a medium sized ranch home. 2 relatively small bedrooms, one master suite, kitchen with dining area and living room. Right now its totally trashed.....every room in the house has kitchen things in it, or closet things....including the deck. Which at various times throughout the day has had the range, the table, the mini fridge, and scores of various bits and parts stored on it.
The flooring is done, the previous bit was written before ultimate collapse of the body occured. It is gorgeous. Now the rest of the kitchen looks a bit shabby. sheesh, home improvements are a pain.....and never ending.
We are putting new flooring into the kitchen and hallways. It's a medium sized ranch home. 2 relatively small bedrooms, one master suite, kitchen with dining area and living room. Right now its totally trashed.....every room in the house has kitchen things in it, or closet things....including the deck. Which at various times throughout the day has had the range, the table, the mini fridge, and scores of various bits and parts stored on it.
The flooring is done, the previous bit was written before ultimate collapse of the body occured. It is gorgeous. Now the rest of the kitchen looks a bit shabby. sheesh, home improvements are a pain.....and never ending.
Wednesday, April 20, 2005
Crickets are evil creatures.
It is that time of year when the outside sounds get LOUD.
Actually its the time of year we begin to leave windows open, and all of the sounds that we didn't hear all winter long, come back. The birds setting up a racket at dawn, the crickets chirping their hearts out.
Do not get me wrong, I love the sounds of the world waking up, I love the sounds of spring and summer in the morning. My issue is that they seem to get loudest 20 minutes before the alarm goes off.
This particular cricket is still chirping enough to wake the neighborhood. Where is the volume control????
It is that time of year when the outside sounds get LOUD.
Actually its the time of year we begin to leave windows open, and all of the sounds that we didn't hear all winter long, come back. The birds setting up a racket at dawn, the crickets chirping their hearts out.
Do not get me wrong, I love the sounds of the world waking up, I love the sounds of spring and summer in the morning. My issue is that they seem to get loudest 20 minutes before the alarm goes off.
This particular cricket is still chirping enough to wake the neighborhood. Where is the volume control????
Monday, April 18, 2005
Dear Mom,
I decided that it is about time that I clear up some misconceptions. But first, I am not a puppet, no one has made me behave the way I behave, I really have not changed who I am, this is me.
I have made choices in my life, most often with little support, that have taken me to where I am today. I may have some regrets about where I have ended up, but given the situations I made the choices in, I would not, could not have made any other decisions.
The only choice I wish to address right here and now, is the one that limits how much interaction I have with my mother. I know you do not understand my choice, and I really don't expect that this will make it any more palatable, but I did think it was time to explain.
My first decision was to limit the chaos I allow into my day to day life. Unfortunately that means limiting the amount of time spent in certain relationships. That includes the one with you. You activly solicit the chaos under the guise of spending time with your grand/greatgrand children, and then you get into the middle of their lives. The lies and the hurts and the confusion and the anger flow steadily from there. I choose not to have this in my life. It breaks my heart that this also means I have limited contact with 2 of my children and have been cut off completely from my first/oldest grandchildren.
You make your choices as well. Most of them have been contrary to what I would wish, but they are your choices. I appreciate everything you have done to help me out. I love you.....you are my mother. But I do not think I wish to have an active relationship with you...I value my sanity more. Besides you have my sister close at hand, and you have a much better relationship with my exhusband and his wife. Admit it.....as much as you taught us to value our differences, I am just too different.
Cie la vie. I am who I am and will be.
I decided that it is about time that I clear up some misconceptions. But first, I am not a puppet, no one has made me behave the way I behave, I really have not changed who I am, this is me.
I have made choices in my life, most often with little support, that have taken me to where I am today. I may have some regrets about where I have ended up, but given the situations I made the choices in, I would not, could not have made any other decisions.
The only choice I wish to address right here and now, is the one that limits how much interaction I have with my mother. I know you do not understand my choice, and I really don't expect that this will make it any more palatable, but I did think it was time to explain.
My first decision was to limit the chaos I allow into my day to day life. Unfortunately that means limiting the amount of time spent in certain relationships. That includes the one with you. You activly solicit the chaos under the guise of spending time with your grand/greatgrand children, and then you get into the middle of their lives. The lies and the hurts and the confusion and the anger flow steadily from there. I choose not to have this in my life. It breaks my heart that this also means I have limited contact with 2 of my children and have been cut off completely from my first/oldest grandchildren.
You make your choices as well. Most of them have been contrary to what I would wish, but they are your choices. I appreciate everything you have done to help me out. I love you.....you are my mother. But I do not think I wish to have an active relationship with you...I value my sanity more. Besides you have my sister close at hand, and you have a much better relationship with my exhusband and his wife. Admit it.....as much as you taught us to value our differences, I am just too different.
Cie la vie. I am who I am and will be.
Sunday, April 17, 2005
How can I help you?
What has happened to the concept of customer service?
I ask this as the second time in two weeks I am back to dialup internet service (and not happy about it) because of a faulty modem....this time the one they just sent out.
So it is midnight on a Friday night. I am just home from a day that started at 5am, and the last time I checked e-mail was at work, about 4pm. I thought checking it was a good idea, but when I sat down to do it, there was no response from the ISP. As DSL modems are on 24x7, they occasionally need to be power cycled. I did that 3 or 4 times. The modem went into a lovely flashing light display on a loop. SO at that point (actually a few minutes later, so I could calm myself) I called tech support to see what was actually happening.
After playing push-button bingo to find a live person, I reached a young man who in rather short order told me that the modem was bad, they would replace it by ordering a new one on Monday. I explained that this was not a viable solution, as that meant I had no access to the service I purchase and pay for, and that given this was the second occurance in as many weeks, my desire to remain a customer was becoming limited. He offered me the customer service number so that in the morning, I could call and cancel my service if I wished, but there was really nothing he could do for me.
I understand the reality. This young man was not able to offer me any solution that was going to make me happy....he did not have that solution available. BUT the thing he should have had was good customer service skills. I ended up speaking with a supervisor, who provided a viable solution, a future option, and a boatload of customer service.
As someone who has been in customer service all of her life, I find it very disappointing that more and more, companies are going the quantity versus quality route when it comes to customer service....'specially in the call centers. As we become more and more an electronic society, and more and more of our customer service is over the telephones rather than face to face, I am finding that customer service is really a dying art.
I only have one suggestion. ALWAYS ask to speak to a supervisor, and keep on moving up the line to the next supervisor if necessary. Do not scream at the CSR, most often the policies are not discussed with them, and they really have no options in helping you. How they present that information can make or break the conversation for me, but a supervisor somewhere usually has some lee-way.
For a few more days, I will be using dialup service, until they ship another modem to me. I will stick with that modem until they can set up the other service....some other modem/system that is supposed to be better. I will give that a try, but this time if there are problems, I am out of there. Means an email address change, which I prefer to avoid, but there has to be a better (read more reliable) option.
There HAS to be!
Currently playing in iTunes: I Can Do That by Wayne Cilento
I ask this as the second time in two weeks I am back to dialup internet service (and not happy about it) because of a faulty modem....this time the one they just sent out.
So it is midnight on a Friday night. I am just home from a day that started at 5am, and the last time I checked e-mail was at work, about 4pm. I thought checking it was a good idea, but when I sat down to do it, there was no response from the ISP. As DSL modems are on 24x7, they occasionally need to be power cycled. I did that 3 or 4 times. The modem went into a lovely flashing light display on a loop. SO at that point (actually a few minutes later, so I could calm myself) I called tech support to see what was actually happening.
After playing push-button bingo to find a live person, I reached a young man who in rather short order told me that the modem was bad, they would replace it by ordering a new one on Monday. I explained that this was not a viable solution, as that meant I had no access to the service I purchase and pay for, and that given this was the second occurance in as many weeks, my desire to remain a customer was becoming limited. He offered me the customer service number so that in the morning, I could call and cancel my service if I wished, but there was really nothing he could do for me.
I understand the reality. This young man was not able to offer me any solution that was going to make me happy....he did not have that solution available. BUT the thing he should have had was good customer service skills. I ended up speaking with a supervisor, who provided a viable solution, a future option, and a boatload of customer service.
As someone who has been in customer service all of her life, I find it very disappointing that more and more, companies are going the quantity versus quality route when it comes to customer service....'specially in the call centers. As we become more and more an electronic society, and more and more of our customer service is over the telephones rather than face to face, I am finding that customer service is really a dying art.
I only have one suggestion. ALWAYS ask to speak to a supervisor, and keep on moving up the line to the next supervisor if necessary. Do not scream at the CSR, most often the policies are not discussed with them, and they really have no options in helping you. How they present that information can make or break the conversation for me, but a supervisor somewhere usually has some lee-way.
For a few more days, I will be using dialup service, until they ship another modem to me. I will stick with that modem until they can set up the other service....some other modem/system that is supposed to be better. I will give that a try, but this time if there are problems, I am out of there. Means an email address change, which I prefer to avoid, but there has to be a better (read more reliable) option.
There HAS to be!
Currently playing in iTunes: I Can Do That by Wayne Cilento
Thursday, April 14, 2005
You are an INFJ!
As an INFJ, you are Intraverted, iNtuative, Feeling , and Judging.
This makes your primary focus on Intraverted Intuation with Extraverted Feeling.
This is defined as a NF personality, which is part of Carl Jung's Idealist (Identity Seeking) type, and more specifically the Counselors or Protectors
As a weblogger, you are a perfectionist. Even though you have artistic thoughts, you may change designs frequently because of this perfectionistic insticts. You appreciate order and systems, and so you may stay with the same weblog program for a long time to keep things constant. Your personality type is rare, and so you are very special!
My Bloginality is INFJ!!!
This makes your primary focus on Intraverted Intuation with Extraverted Feeling.
This is defined as a NF personality, which is part of Carl Jung's Idealist (Identity Seeking) type, and more specifically the Counselors or Protectors
As a weblogger, you are a perfectionist. Even though you have artistic thoughts, you may change designs frequently because of this perfectionistic insticts. You appreciate order and systems, and so you may stay with the same weblog program for a long time to keep things constant. Your personality type is rare, and so you are very special!
My Bloginality is INFJ!!!
Tuesday, April 12, 2005
Friends and other strangers
Currently playing in iTunes: Hard Habit to Break by Chicago
Suzanne at Suburban Lesbian brought up an interesting topic recently.
Lesbian friends....are they friends just because they are lesbians or are they friends because of commonalities. Given my involvement with the community I know lots of lesbians, but honestly have called few friend. For me, friends means something special, more things in common than just gender and preference. Not that I expect my friends to be carbon copies, to like all the things I like.....in fact, far from it. I enjoy the differences in my friendships, things that I can learn about, things that I can broaden my experience with, and having things I too can share.
The commonalities, for me, need to be about thought process, ethic, ways of being in the world. My friends don't need to like to watch figure skating, or read romances, they don’t have to love children, they don’t even have to be lesbians. My friends do need to believe in a consitant ethic, they need to care about the planet and the people on it. They need to believe in rights for all people and have respect for the other inhabitants of our lives.
I have had lots of friends. Friends of the road, those people who enrich our lives on our life's journey, who pass in and out, sharing and moving on....and friends of the heart, those special people who are with us no matter how far away, no matter how often we see them. I have lesbian, gay, straight, male, female, transgendered, bisexual, childhood, adult, bio-family, family of choice, neighborhood, co-worker, etc. friends.
What are the top 5 things you have to have present for a friendship to grow?
Mine are:
Suzanne at Suburban Lesbian brought up an interesting topic recently.
Lesbian friends....are they friends just because they are lesbians or are they friends because of commonalities. Given my involvement with the community I know lots of lesbians, but honestly have called few friend. For me, friends means something special, more things in common than just gender and preference. Not that I expect my friends to be carbon copies, to like all the things I like.....in fact, far from it. I enjoy the differences in my friendships, things that I can learn about, things that I can broaden my experience with, and having things I too can share.
The commonalities, for me, need to be about thought process, ethic, ways of being in the world. My friends don't need to like to watch figure skating, or read romances, they don’t have to love children, they don’t even have to be lesbians. My friends do need to believe in a consitant ethic, they need to care about the planet and the people on it. They need to believe in rights for all people and have respect for the other inhabitants of our lives.
I have had lots of friends. Friends of the road, those people who enrich our lives on our life's journey, who pass in and out, sharing and moving on....and friends of the heart, those special people who are with us no matter how far away, no matter how often we see them. I have lesbian, gay, straight, male, female, transgendered, bisexual, childhood, adult, bio-family, family of choice, neighborhood, co-worker, etc. friends.
What are the top 5 things you have to have present for a friendship to grow?
Mine are:
- A consistant ethic
- A sense of humor
- Willingness to get involved
- Honesty
- Caring
To be 50 and....
Currently playing in iTunes: Medley: Turning It Over/Joanna/Sweet Darlin' Woman/If I Live (I'll Be Great)/Ode To A Gym Teacher... by Meg Christian/Cris Williamson
to be 50 and still be worrying about a stable income.....sux
to be 50 and know that there is nothing put away for the future, that
employment will have to continue until I can no longer work.....stinks
to be 50 and know that retirement as most people know it will not be an option is sad.
BUT
it was my choice to leave a relationship that was not healthy for me and that was not healthy for my children.
it was my choice to have children and not a college education. it was my choice to stay home with my children as long as i could, and it was my choice not to try and juggle school, children and work.
it was my choice not to use the courts to get more money. it was my choice to take what ever employment I could get and try and survive on that.
so it follows that it was my choice to live out my years trying to survive,
much as I have always. [SIGH]
to be 50 and still be worrying about a stable income.....sux
to be 50 and know that there is nothing put away for the future, that
employment will have to continue until I can no longer work.....stinks
to be 50 and know that retirement as most people know it will not be an option is sad.
BUT
it was my choice to leave a relationship that was not healthy for me and that was not healthy for my children.
it was my choice to have children and not a college education. it was my choice to stay home with my children as long as i could, and it was my choice not to try and juggle school, children and work.
it was my choice not to use the courts to get more money. it was my choice to take what ever employment I could get and try and survive on that.
so it follows that it was my choice to live out my years trying to survive,
much as I have always. [SIGH]
Monday, April 11, 2005
Kids and yardwork
The newest grand kids were here this past weekend. They worked their little tail ends off, picking up dog piles, moving leaves and tarps, putting tables and chairs throughout the yard. Then we had a cookout and later a bonfire with s'mores. All in all it was a great Saturday.
We got to know the kids better, which was a good thing....and a not so good thing. The life they lead is pretty gruesome for the most part. Mom is more concerned about her new family and they are used to babysit and do the work. Mom is in an abusive relationship, which spills over on to them regularly, and they just do not seem to have much of a child's life.
Point in case; when son #2 got a cell phone call during dinner, he answered it. Not knowing our house rules (do not call during dinner) we let him talk and then teased a bit to get him off the phone. We later found out it was Mom, and she called him back later to read him the riot act about our behavior. When I found that out, I apologized to him, and he just blew it off....he is used to it.
It makes me angry to see children misused, abused. Biology does not make a viable parent. Some people have no right to the children they gave birth to.
We will continue to provide an alternative.
Currently playing in iTunes: Putting It Together by Barbra Streisand
We got to know the kids better, which was a good thing....and a not so good thing. The life they lead is pretty gruesome for the most part. Mom is more concerned about her new family and they are used to babysit and do the work. Mom is in an abusive relationship, which spills over on to them regularly, and they just do not seem to have much of a child's life.
Point in case; when son #2 got a cell phone call during dinner, he answered it. Not knowing our house rules (do not call during dinner) we let him talk and then teased a bit to get him off the phone. We later found out it was Mom, and she called him back later to read him the riot act about our behavior. When I found that out, I apologized to him, and he just blew it off....he is used to it.
It makes me angry to see children misused, abused. Biology does not make a viable parent. Some people have no right to the children they gave birth to.
We will continue to provide an alternative.
Currently playing in iTunes: Putting It Together by Barbra Streisand
Time management
Currently playing in iTunes: Get Up by Cris Williamson & Tret Fure
The busy season begins a bit early this year. Every year, up here in the northern winters, we hibernate a little. And then spring arrives and the social calendar blossoms as full as any botanical garden. Much of it is obligatory, committee meetings, must attend kinds of things, and fun things too. Plus a thousand things to do around the house and yard.
By the time the dead of summer arrives with its heat and humidity, motivation to go out and brave the energy sapping weather melts away.
It's a little overwhelming to get back into the swing of things again....this year in particular it seems like its beginning earlier and faster. This week has suddenly become a 7 day event.
Maybe part of the intensity comes from the fact that I am feeling kind of dead in the water about making the big change in my life. I just can't do it right now.....the opportunity does not seem to be panning out, and I am not in a position where i can think of leaping off the precipice without knowing there is a safety net below. That kinda sux, but I refuse to do the expected thing this time....I am going to do the right thing for me.
Til the time is right, I will keep on keeping on, going, doing, and .......
The busy season begins a bit early this year. Every year, up here in the northern winters, we hibernate a little. And then spring arrives and the social calendar blossoms as full as any botanical garden. Much of it is obligatory, committee meetings, must attend kinds of things, and fun things too. Plus a thousand things to do around the house and yard.
By the time the dead of summer arrives with its heat and humidity, motivation to go out and brave the energy sapping weather melts away.
It's a little overwhelming to get back into the swing of things again....this year in particular it seems like its beginning earlier and faster. This week has suddenly become a 7 day event.
Maybe part of the intensity comes from the fact that I am feeling kind of dead in the water about making the big change in my life. I just can't do it right now.....the opportunity does not seem to be panning out, and I am not in a position where i can think of leaping off the precipice without knowing there is a safety net below. That kinda sux, but I refuse to do the expected thing this time....I am going to do the right thing for me.
Til the time is right, I will keep on keeping on, going, doing, and .......
Sunday, April 10, 2005
It took the afternoon, but the blog now has a new look and everything works. The only thing lost was all of my readers wonderful comments, but I expect that a few of you will comment again.
I will continue to tweak this layout, but I think it will work for some time. It is cleaner and not so green.
I will continue to tweak this layout, but I think it will work for some time. It is cleaner and not so green.
Newsflash: It's the 60's all over again
I don't expect this blog to become a news blog, nor do I intend to get political on a regular basis here but this is something I just had to share. The Capital Times, one of two local newspapers in the state capital, offers this opinion on the goings on of the largest city in the state. As I read it, my stomach rolled. I got frustrated, and angry and scared almost simultaneously.
Where are we headed in this world, if this kind of thing is still being supported by the judicial system. We are going backwards. Something has to change, fast. Do something. All of you. Get involved. Stop this backslide into the past. Despite the nostalgia, those were not simpler and better times....unless of course, if you were a white male.
The biggest difference between then and now is that there were more things hidden. The religious right has latched onto the emotions of the public, the fears of the masses, and brainwashed people. How did money get to be the prime motivator? We need to go back to caring about people, not money.
Shit like this scares me.
Where are we headed in this world, if this kind of thing is still being supported by the judicial system. We are going backwards. Something has to change, fast. Do something. All of you. Get involved. Stop this backslide into the past. Despite the nostalgia, those were not simpler and better times....unless of course, if you were a white male.
The biggest difference between then and now is that there were more things hidden. The religious right has latched onto the emotions of the public, the fears of the masses, and brainwashed people. How did money get to be the prime motivator? We need to go back to caring about people, not money.
Shit like this scares me.
Spring is sprung
Spring is definitely here.
The first real daffodil, and a surprise little purple crocus.
The first yard cleaning.
The first lawn mowing.
The first outdoor meal.
Finally.
Currently playing in iTunes: Sky Dances by Holly Near
The first real daffodil, and a surprise little purple crocus.
The first yard cleaning.
The first lawn mowing.
The first outdoor meal.
Finally.
Currently playing in iTunes: Sky Dances by Holly Near
Friday, April 08, 2005
Diabetic redux
Time once again to get on the diabetes wagon.
When I first got diagnosed, I was good about what I ate and followed all the rules and took pretty good care of myself. Even working day in and day out with food (as a caterer and food services manager) I managed to keep myself in good shape. Then all hell broke loose.....the adored job came crashing to an end, and in a desperation move, I grabbed the first job I could get: call center Customer Service in a large bank related corporation. Owa tafoo liam.
I knew better even before I took the job. There was no question of my qualifications, and I needed the insurance, so I grabbed it. I knew that corporate America was just about the worst place in the world for me to end up, tho I didn't know what the culture in this company was. Suddenly after being very physically active, and quite in charge of my own realm, I was tethered to a cubicle by a telephone cord, trapped at almost the bottom of the heap in the structure of things, and not even really able to do good customer service (the ONLY perk was pushing for a mentor program for a year and finally able to become one).
My solution to my growing dissatisfaction was food. Nibbles, noshes, and pretty much constant eating....and of course little that was good for me. Combine that with a couple of other health issues, and well, I have not been keeping the diabetes in good control.
But, that is beginning to change. With children out of the house once more, and forced to make my own meals again, it is much easier to make them healthier. I just have to work on the day times.....and that will come soon. So wish me luck, and a different motivation to stop the sweets and snacks.
When I first got diagnosed, I was good about what I ate and followed all the rules and took pretty good care of myself. Even working day in and day out with food (as a caterer and food services manager) I managed to keep myself in good shape. Then all hell broke loose.....the adored job came crashing to an end, and in a desperation move, I grabbed the first job I could get: call center Customer Service in a large bank related corporation. Owa tafoo liam.
I knew better even before I took the job. There was no question of my qualifications, and I needed the insurance, so I grabbed it. I knew that corporate America was just about the worst place in the world for me to end up, tho I didn't know what the culture in this company was. Suddenly after being very physically active, and quite in charge of my own realm, I was tethered to a cubicle by a telephone cord, trapped at almost the bottom of the heap in the structure of things, and not even really able to do good customer service (the ONLY perk was pushing for a mentor program for a year and finally able to become one).
My solution to my growing dissatisfaction was food. Nibbles, noshes, and pretty much constant eating....and of course little that was good for me. Combine that with a couple of other health issues, and well, I have not been keeping the diabetes in good control.
But, that is beginning to change. With children out of the house once more, and forced to make my own meals again, it is much easier to make them healthier. I just have to work on the day times.....and that will come soon. So wish me luck, and a different motivation to stop the sweets and snacks.
Mams and more
My grandmother role is a constantly expanding one, and it is totally out of my control for the most part. Most recently is the addition of 4 (functionally only 3) as my daughter gets ready to remarry a man with 3 younger kids and one adult son. We haven't met the adult son, but the young ones have become a fixture in our lives.
They all call me Mams...which is the Buglet's grandma name for me, and altho it's going to take me a while to get used to other voices using it, it is kind of a sweet feeling.
They all call me Mams...which is the Buglet's grandma name for me, and altho it's going to take me a while to get used to other voices using it, it is kind of a sweet feeling.
Thursday, April 07, 2005
Ch-ch-changes
Well I think I may be making some blog design changes.
I do not seem to be "getting" the trackback thing...nor does it have any interesting sidelines or connections to anything, and that is the main reason I went with Haloscan comments.
I am also getting a bit bored with the green color of this template (greens not being my favorite in the spectrum unless they are kelly or forest greens).....
so stay tuned for some major visual changes here soon.
I do not seem to be "getting" the trackback thing...nor does it have any interesting sidelines or connections to anything, and that is the main reason I went with Haloscan comments.
I am also getting a bit bored with the green color of this template (greens not being my favorite in the spectrum unless they are kelly or forest greens).....
so stay tuned for some major visual changes here soon.
cartoon moods
I have been seeing this little moodie cartoon on a number of blogs and decided to try her out for a spin.....
She is kinda cute. will see if she can keep up with my moods :)
She is kinda cute. will see if she can keep up with my moods :)
Wednesday, April 06, 2005
The gender of my brain.....
Your Brain is 66.67% Female, 33.33% Male |
Your brain leans female You think with your heart, not your head Sweet and considerate, you are a giver But you're tough enough not to let anyone take advantage of you! |
Monday, April 04, 2005
life in the ....... lane
Such a jampacked weekend....with so many facets, so many different things going on.
family....issues, situations, pride, connections, joys and hurts, traipsing around, dressing up, dressing down, understanding dress codes...
sore feet, impeccable service, awesome food, food and more than too much food;
fancy suv’s, a different language, another language that needs no translation, love and ego, acting as if...
total exhaustion, early morning breakfasts, barefoot and guilty food pleasures.
Currently playing in iTunes: Postcard From Paradise by Cris Williamson & Tret Fure
family....issues, situations, pride, connections, joys and hurts, traipsing around, dressing up, dressing down, understanding dress codes...
sore feet, impeccable service, awesome food, food and more than too much food;
fancy suv’s, a different language, another language that needs no translation, love and ego, acting as if...
total exhaustion, early morning breakfasts, barefoot and guilty food pleasures.
Currently playing in iTunes: Postcard From Paradise by Cris Williamson & Tret Fure
Absolute Internet Frustration
Come home after a few days away to find that you have no internet.
Find out its the modem and, it will be two days before you can get a new dsl modem. those two days coincide with the last 2 days of my vacation....my days...shot to hell.
It's amazing how we come to depend on our basic services including internet...and our expectation that they will always be available.
For me, at this moment, I think its more about the lack of choice, and the loss of what little time I can claim for myself.
The internet has become something that means a lot to me. Its reading material, research space, communication venue, mode of relaxation, source of information, the ever present dictionary, encyclopedia, source of learning material, and more.
I warned my brother-in-law, when back in the early days he teased me about not getting a modem. Told him that I was afraid I would get addicted. Only proves I know myself well.
So the plan is muddy....haven't figured out how to proceed. I could call the ISP and rattle more chains, get myself a dialup connection for the duration, go buy a dsl modem for myself, use the services wireless has to offer (as I am doing right now). Decisions, decisions, decisions.....something I had thot to take a couple of days break from....but it seems they are everywhere.
So soon I will go back home and make some phone calls, try to decide what to do next.
[sigh]
Find out its the modem and, it will be two days before you can get a new dsl modem. those two days coincide with the last 2 days of my vacation....my days...shot to hell.
It's amazing how we come to depend on our basic services including internet...and our expectation that they will always be available.
For me, at this moment, I think its more about the lack of choice, and the loss of what little time I can claim for myself.
The internet has become something that means a lot to me. Its reading material, research space, communication venue, mode of relaxation, source of information, the ever present dictionary, encyclopedia, source of learning material, and more.
I warned my brother-in-law, when back in the early days he teased me about not getting a modem. Told him that I was afraid I would get addicted. Only proves I know myself well.
So the plan is muddy....haven't figured out how to proceed. I could call the ISP and rattle more chains, get myself a dialup connection for the duration, go buy a dsl modem for myself, use the services wireless has to offer (as I am doing right now). Decisions, decisions, decisions.....something I had thot to take a couple of days break from....but it seems they are everywhere.
So soon I will go back home and make some phone calls, try to decide what to do next.
[sigh]
Friday, April 01, 2005
Living like the other side does
It isn't very often that I experience this kind of luxury....
The grand event is upon us, and one of the side benefits are bits and touches of luxury. The 9th floor of the fancy hotel, locked to the public, the fancy lounge, breakfast and appetizers at 5, fancy folded towels and a rubber ducky for the bath.....
not standard fare in the world of the under funded masses.
Something I could get used to though.
Something many people take for granted in their worlds.
Sigh
But for the moment its fun.
The grand event is upon us, and one of the side benefits are bits and touches of luxury. The 9th floor of the fancy hotel, locked to the public, the fancy lounge, breakfast and appetizers at 5, fancy folded towels and a rubber ducky for the bath.....
not standard fare in the world of the under funded masses.
Something I could get used to though.
Something many people take for granted in their worlds.
Sigh
But for the moment its fun.
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